Twain Deputations
by CovertThePenguin
Summary: Uncle Nigel wants Private to meet up with him for 'Private Business', and forbids Skipper and the gang to come with him. The trio wants to tail Private but later finds out that they have to go on a mission themselves, too, which needs to be kept from Private. With the younger away, this is the perfect chance for them complete their mission. Will they finish it on time?
1. And We're Off!

**Note: This takes place before 'Our Man in Grrfurjiclestan'.**

* * *

"Got any 9s?" Skipper asked Rico as he looked up from his pile of cards.

"Nope. Go fish!" Rico hid his card with a grin, earning a suspicious look from his leader.

"Ya sure?"

"Yep!"

Skipper groaned and turned to grab a card, but a better idea came into his mind. He snatched Rico's pile with a smirk and a flipper.

"Eyyyyyy!" Rico tried to get them back, but Skipper fought his wings with his free one, his smirk growing bigger by each second.

"Knew you were cheating," Skipper placed both his and Rico's cards on the table, still beaming.

"Guys guys guys! There's a postcard at our doorstep!" Private squealed excitedly from above.

"Postcard?" Skipper hurried up the hatch, along with the other two.

"Kowalski, analysis."

Kowalski picked the postcard up and licked it, "Cardboard. There's writing behind it, too, written in ink made from-"

"Well what are we waiting for? Let's go to the chimps!" Skipper rubbed his flippers excitedly. He'd longed for someone to send him and the team a message, and that it would be about them going on a secret mission. He grabbed it and was the first to belly-slide away with Kowalski pouting for not letting him finish his sentence.

* * *

"'From Uncle Nigel', it says." Mason translated what Phil signed.

"Ooh! Uncle Nigel sent me that!?" Private clapped his flippers. He'd always adored his uncle, you know, him being his only family by blood and all, but most importantly, he's a secret agent. A really good one!

"Oh... Him. Again..." Kowalski replied indifferently.

"I still can't believe the fact that he's a secret agent... And that he thinks that your nancy-cat-ness is just part of your 'secret identity'." Skipper used air-quotes with a roll of his eyes.

"Ooh!" Rico applauded. "Kaboom boom!"

"I don't think there's an evil lair waiting to be blown up this time..." Private smiled to Rico, who frowned sadly.

"It says, 'Private's Uncle Nigel requires him to go to the Grand Central Terminal asap because of urgent private business.'" Mason continued.

"Good! We'll go as soon as we finish packing our-"

" _Alone_."

"A-Alone?" Skipper asked as he cocked his head. "Why?"

"It's _private business_ , did you not see that?!" The chimp pointed to a series of words.

"Wow. He's good!" Kowalski gasped in awe as Skipper groaned.

"I-I guess I should be going now..." Private rubbed his head in a bashful sort of manner.

"Yeah yeah yeah! Oou go doo dat!" Rico nodded frantically as Skipper sighed disappointedly. No missions for him and a day without Private's cheeriness.

"Right! See you! And thank you, Mason and Phil!" Private dashed out of the Zoo.

"Come on boys, let's follow the private," Skipper decided. There's nothing special today anyway, why not do something exciting?

"Skipper, are you sure that he wouldn't mind? And worse, Nigel spotting us?" Kowalski asked as Rico nodded in agreement.

"I need action! I can't just sit around the Zoo all day!" Skipper complained. "We should-"

*ding*

Skipper quickly sprang to his battle stance. What was that all about? It seemed to have come from somewhere near him...

"Show yourself, space squid!" He commanded as his eyes searched his surroundings.

"Relax, Skipper! It's just my new device, which _I_ invented, thank you, sending me a notification in voice-message mode when new vital things come out!"

"Ooh, might come in handy! Tell me, when will Hans strike?"

"Um... It doesn't really work that way... _But_ , I did learn about when the upcoming season of 'Shirtless Ninja Action Theatre' is coming out a few days ago!"

"Just, gimme that." Skipper snatched the device from Kowalski and turned it on. His eyes widened with shock after he heard the voice message.

"No way. Nuh uh. This ain't real, is this...? He would be so devastated..."

"What's wrong? Who's going to be devastated?"

He looked up from the device. "Boys, looks like we _do_ have a mission today after all! A _secret_ mission!"

Kowalski cleared his throat.

"Oh um... Right. Hear for yourselves," he handed the device over to Kowalski and Rico. Kowalski's jaw dropped and Rico gasped.

"Ah, well. I knew this day would come." Kowalski commented.

"We'll bring it back without letting him know! First, we'll have to-"

"Um... Excuse me... Would you mind going back to your habitat? Phil and I have... Things to do," Mason said apologetically.

"Sorry about that, higher mammal." Skipper said and signalled the boys to come with him.

* * *

"Hey, champ!" Nigel waved upon seeing his nephew. "How're ya doin'?"

"Uncle Nigel!" Private exclaimed and hugged him. "Ah! I missed you! I'm doing fine, thank you! You?"

"I'm doing alright as well, but we have urgent matters. Come with me." Nigel said giddily as he headed outside of the station and to an empty alley.

"What urgent matters?" Private tilted his head as he caught up with his uncle.

"Our base has been broken into." He turned to Private, with his expression and tone changing into much more serious ones in a few mere seconds. The younger gasped, "What? I thought the security guards were-"

"Knocked out, by a trespasser in a disguise. We caught him trying to steal files of the Red Squirrel and he threw tranquiliser darts at us! All those hit still haven't woken up yet! Most importantly, during interrogation, he told me that he knew _you_." Nigel crossed his flippers, eyes boring into his nephew's. "Now, Private, why would you associate with trespassers? There must be an explanation for this!"

"But Uncle Nigel... I... How did he- Who's he?"

"He said his name was 'Rocket', but I doubt that."

Private furrowed his brows. "Roc...ket... His name sounds familiar someh-"

"Private!"

"What?! I don't even know anyone named Rocket! That name sounds familiar that's all! Look! I can prove it to you that I'm not his partner in crime! Why would he want to steal those files anyway?"

"That's not the point, lad. I must bring you back to the base-"

"But Uncle Nigel! Don't you trust me?" Private looked at Nigel, tears forming. Nigel's expression softened. "Of course I do! You didn't let me finish! I wanted to say, 'To the base, so that I can let you question Rocket, and let you figure out why he wants those files!"

He couldn't believe it. His uncle trusted him completely to take care of his prisoner. He wasn't sure how to feel about this, but he was glad that his uncle didn't decide to lock him in a cell.

"T-Thank you," he grinned at the superior as he hugged him.

"Now, let's set off! Follow me," the older instructed.

* * *

 **Hello guys! I know. I have written something in my profile which concerns my writing schedule _but_ I... Uh... Will change that statement. I need to write. Exams will not stop me from my passion ****XD Thank you for reading :D**


	2. Tunnels

"Men, we need to arrive at the studio at 0930 hours, sharp. We have an hour to think this through. Kowalski, options." Skipper said, turning to the taller penguin.

"Since we have to negotiate with the producers, we'll need a human disguise. We already have one, you know, the one with the overcoat and the hat? But we're one penguin short-"

"Way ahead of oou!" Rico regurgitated a shorter overcoat and smirked.

"Okayyyyyyyy that's solved then. But lately, more and more pizza guys started to suspect us because of my translator's robotic voice... I think it'll need an upgrade. Can you give me one more hour? Skipper?"

"Another hour will already let them set their minds of discontinuing the show for good _and_ have the merchandise destroyed _and_ thrown into space! So, nope."

"But Skipper-"

"Did you hear me? N-O-P-E. NO!"

"Okay okay!" Kowalski moved his flippers as if he was pushing Skipper away from a distance.

"Yeesh!" Rico chimed in.

"Anyway..." The brains continued. "I think there's a shuttle bus straight to there for workers. We'll hop in at around 9 and I think we'll be there at around 9.20. We go up to the 14th floor, where the department for making the Lunacorns is located on, and say that we're a new worker, and find a way to tell them that the Lunacorns are educational... _When they totally aren't._

Or hold a knife to the producers' neck and tell them that we'll kill them if they don't continue it."

"Ooh! Second one! Second one!" Rico clapped excitedly.

Skipper shook his head and slapped both Rico and Kowalski.

"Kowalski!"

"What? I don't want to seem like I've run out of options! Besides, Rico liked it." He earned another slap.

"We're going with the first one. End of story. Men, let's go dress up!"

The lieutenant and sergeant blinked.

"That sounded better in my head... Let's just go."

* * *

Private sighed contently at his surroundings, smiling. He was in a private jet, with relaxing music and a gigantic projector with screen. He sat on the most comfortable chair he'd ever sat on (his opinion) with an iced coconut drink with a pair of sunglasses on next to his uncle, who was also receiving the same treatment, and loads and loads more cool things around him that you can imagine.

Nigel took his sunglasses off. "Well, since we have a lot of time now, approximately 7 hours, we'd better come up with theories about who Rocket is and what we should do to him if he was lying. Private, what do you suggest?"

"Ooh! A button!" Private pressed the button which has the word 'DISCO' engraved onto it. A disco ball shot into the air and funky music started to play. He laughed and danced in circles around Nigel and got smacked.

"Private. Please, be serious." Nigel sighed disappointedly as he stopped the music. Private chuckled nervously as he sat back down on his seat.

"I'm sorry, but this is just SO COOL!" The adélie just couldn't simmer down. He'd never ever seen such a big and high-tech place, even better than the North-Wind airplanes, he thought and exhaled, still excited.

"Sure is, champ! Now, let's get back to business-"

"Ooh! Another button! What does it do?"

"Private!"

"Sorry..." He rubbed his head as Nigel sighed once again.

* * *

"Oomph! Sorry!" Kowalski typed onto his device quickly.

"Watch where you're going, punk!" The person the Penguins bumped into spat.

"Heh heh..." Kowalski sighed.

"Kowalski, status report!" Skipper said, looking up from the schedule Rico hocked up.

"Rico." Skipper looked up. Rico nodded knowingly, and regurgitated a watch. "Ey fifty eyev!"

"Five minutes left, Kowalski, are we there y-"

"Ouch. That must hurt... Sorry!" Kowalski typed onto his device again as the victim muttered something under his breath.

"Yeah!" Kowalski looked down. "We're there!"

"Thank goodness we don't have to bump into more strangers-"

"Sorry!"

"Tall guy, can you _please_ watch where you're going?" Skipper snapped.

"...Sorry."

"Hey! New guy!" A random man in front of them greeted.

"Uh... Hi..."

"'Sup, bro?"

"Um... 'Sup...?"

"What's your name, new guy?"

"Uh-"

"Gimme that, Kowalski, you aren't supposed to say 'um' or 'uh' in front of everything you say! It'd be suspicious!" Skipper hastily snatched the device from Kowalski.

"None of your business."

"Geez! I was just asking for your name!"

"Well, I don't think it's necessary."

The man turned to the woman in front of him. "Can you believe this guy?" The woman sighed and continued to play on her phone.

"Great, Skipper, you just lost a chance of getting closer to someone." Kowalski commented.

"We aren't here to make friends, Kowalski, we're here to save Private's heart from breaking."

"Well, I'm just saying that there's a possibility that he's close to the boss or works in the Lunacorn department as well, and he might be able to aid us."

"Oh... Haven't thought of that. Whatever."

Suddenly, a large sound of an engine roared. The Penguins gasped as they watched as the shuttle bus set off.

"This is bad. _Real_ bad. That's when training comes into handy, boys! On three, we jump on top of the shuttle.

...

Three."

The Penguins made their way up in no time. Just a few seconds after they caught their breath,

"Kipper! Dunnel!" Rico screeched as the three screamed.

* * *

"The London Eye!" Private gasped with such amazement, Nigel had to chuckle.

"That's right! But we're not here to sightsee, boy." He said, dragging his nephew before a sewer lid. He whispered something into it and it opened for him, leading towards a tunnel so deep which seemed like it would never end with red lights dancing in it.

"Wow... This is quite alike to our hatch..."

His uncle nodded and patted the younger penguin's head. "Down the hatchet we go!" He said, pushing Private into the hole, then hopping in himself.

"This reminds me of Space Mountain," Private giggled. "What are those lights for?"

"Body scan, sonny. It'll blow intruders into bits. Don't worry about getting blown up though! I brought you here once when you were young and it'll recognise you."

"Really? Then how'd Rocket get in there?"

"No one knows, really. Some say there's a glitch, some say he's an excellent spy."

"Oh... Oh, look! We're there!" Private clapped.

It's very much like North Wind Headquarters, really, except that it's undewater and there were only penguins working in there. Computers and gadgets were everywhere, and so were reports and documents.

"Nigel! Back so soon?" A penguin asked, slinging his flipper around his comrade's.

"Yep, and I brought somebody."

"Young Private! You're so tall now!"

"Um... Heheh... Yeah..." Private blushed, making the other laugh.

"Anyway, it's nice to meet you. I've got to get back to work, see ya!" He said, rushing away.

"Come on, son, we've got work to do, too."

* * *

"We have no choice, boys. We'll open the emergency exit of the shuttle as quietly as we could and escape from our doom."

"But how?! Our disguise will fly off!"

"We're going to pretend to be toys if our operation is compromised. Rico!" Skipper barked as he ripped off their disguise and threw it towards Rico's direction. Rico swallowed it swiftly.

"Dive dive dive!" Skipper said as he hopped off the top along with the others and grabbed onto the handle. Skipper tried to open it, but it's locked.

"Rico, bobby pin." He snatched the bobby pin, picked the lock, opened the door making as little noise as he could, jumped inside with the two and closed the door.

"Kowalski, time."

"Just give me a few seconds to... Catch my breath..." He said, collapsing onto the chair next to him. "I'm okay now. Uh... Nine o five."

"Great, let's suit up before we'll have to use Plan B."

* * *

 **Hi guys! My exams are over! From now on, I'll be able to write more constantly! :) For those who are waiting for an update of EBS, I am sorry to say this but I'll finish this first rather than that... But I _will_ finish EBS :D**

 **By the way, the 'Lunacorns got cancelled' idea was by StarLilly08 :D She's one of my first readers :3 Thanks a million :)**


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